Note: this is the digest version of the extended essay analyzing how self-esteem is the root cause of all personal problems.
All your personal struggles boil down to the single cause: a faulty self-esteem.
The lower the esteem, the more fearful you become. It permeates in all areas: learning (all growing involves risk), school or job performance, relationships with family, friends and significant others.
There are 3 levels of self-esteem:
- You deserve to exist. The fundamental.
- You are competent. You can deal with life.
- You deserve affluence. You have faith that the world/god takes care of you.
Analyzing where on this spectrum you’re wounded can give you insights about how to heal.
Let’s say you have a lousy job. You’ve always had lousy jobs. This is the symptom — let’s dig down to see where the cause is.
If the level 3 esteem is the only one compromised, you think you’re competent but the world cannot see you as such. You just need to change your belief that you don’t deserve a good job, that there are people out there who recognize your goodness.
If your level 2 esteem is compromised, then you don’t feel that you’re competent enough for a good job, or any job. You fear getting discovered of your secret incompetence — there’s no way you can move on to believing that you deserve a good job.
To heal this, you need to relive your childhood, hopefully under a guidance of a parent-figure. You need to put yourself in a safe environment and explore your abilities and be affirmed on a basic level — that you can do good things and produce good results.
If your level 1 esteem is compromised, you feel insecure not just about your job, but your whole existence. You are likely experiencing multitude of problems in your physical health, social life and emotional stability.
To heal, you need to affirm your existence. If you’re severely compromised here, you may require help from a trained therapist and/or holistic healing artists, but you can do some healing on your own as well.
By healing and restoring a healthy self-esteem, you unlock your capacity for joy, hope and effectiveness. Dig deep and heal from within.