Note: this is a summary version of a longer essay.
The basis of all desires is to be who you are.
All the things you do out of desire is an extension of your fundamental desire to be Who-You-Are. Everything from the choice of your vehicle to who you hang out with to what you wear, your choices are driven by your desire. By acquiring those things, you are looking for tools that allow you to be more of Who-You-Are.
When you were a baby, you were not expected to be anything more or different than who you were. At that point, Who-You-Are is not fully realized, either, so the situation is simple — have some fundamental needs met, and you’re set. When a baby is happy, then all is well. If not, parents start out by suspecting that one of the fundamental needs is not met.
But as we grow, we are subjected to a lot of external entities that tell us who we ought to be, which is usually different from who we are. Schools, for example, make us fit into their one schedule, one set of subjects, each taught one way. If we fit, we are in. If not, then we are no good. Parents try to make us fit, not because it helps us be who we are, but it makes be more acceptable to the society.
What they don’t realize that the methods we choose to pursue are our attempts to allow ourselves to be more of who we are. Some of such efforts are ineffective or inappropriate. But our fundamental desires to be Who-We-Are is never inappropriate and should never be neglected or suppressed in order to be who we should be. When a child desires a toy, what he is saying is “I want to be stimulated.” A parent may or may not give him the toy, but the fundamental desire — that of a curious being wanting to be what it is — should always be honored and fulfilled.
But instead we are taught that some of our desires are wrong and invalid. We can’t be who we are. On top of our foundation, they pile up their expectations of who we should be. The distance between Who-We-Truly-Are and Who-We-Actually-Are grows. We become unfulfilled.
So the growth process begins by cutting down. By destroying much of what we learned, to expose our core and get back to the basics. Only after doing so, can we begin to truly build up and expand — the way we were doing, back when we started.
So here is the fundamental:
- To discover Who-We-Are, and
- To discover ways for us to be more of Who-We-Are.
Let the hacking begin.