All right, I have a confession to make. It’s a bit embarrassing, but here goes….

I just got my first smart mobile device.

It’s not even a smartphone. It’s a used, previous generation iPod Touch.

I know. Here I am, a supposed web professional. But the truth is, I’ve never been an early adapter of new technology. In fact, I’m down right conservative, always letting others take the frustration of debugging new technology. Waiting until industry standards emerge, until something becomes so common place that not having it means you’re not with the times.

Well, it’s clearly reached that point with smart devices. But you know what?

I really hate this thing.

Professionally, I definitely must own one. I need to have a feel for how everybody else is accessing the web. But personally, this thing not only fails to meet my needs — it really is more distracting and annoying than not owning one.

First of all, I really don’t talk much on a cell phone. I use TracFone — whose service I really can’t recommend — and I tolerate it, because it lets me buy 240 minutes of airtime once every other month. $15/month average cost, no contracts. I’ve looked but other carriers don’t have such small-scale plans.

Which brought me to iPod Touch. But this thing does its main role — playing music — much more poorly than my 3-year old iPod Nano. A dedicated music player with some hardware buttons for doing just that, obviously, is simpler and easier to do just that.

That leaves my iPod Touch as a mobile internet access device, but it falls short on that front, too, since it can only act as such when it’s hooked up to a Wi-Fi. Plus, it’s so darn cumbersome to type on that thing, so it’s really frustrating as a mobile e-mail device. Which leads me to a point/opportunity I see in the whole technology sector — technology often is at a point where it’s so limited that humans have to operate more machine-like to be able to use it. Manufacturers and software makers aren’t going the extra mile yet to make machines accommodate humanity.

Well, I know that by being clear and specific with my requirements, I can usually come up with solutions that meet my needs. So here are my wishlist for a mobile internet solution:

• Small enough to fit into a pocket
• Runs on either iOS or Android
• Isn’t a phone, or if so, comes with super low-usage plans
• Runs on a reliable 3G/4G network (Mobile HotSpot a real plus)
• It can sync with Google Mail, Calendar and iTunes
• Has hardware buttons for typing, or at least music play/pause and volume