Tag: decision
The Key to Good Decisions
by Ari Koinuma on Mar.04, 2010, under Lessons of Life, Our Best Version
A simple principle I’m trying to apply to my decision-making is “which way is going to feel better afterwards?”
In the other words, I’m tuning into my imagination to see whether I feel proud of the decision later.
Feelings are great indicators of my state of being. If I’m tired, I’d be unmotivated or move attracted to easier choices.
But it’s often not the indicator of which way I should choose. If the path of quick, instant gratification appeals, I have to seriously question that leaning.
Because I don’t often feel good about it later.
It’s better to feel good later than now — as long as you don’t do it to the extent of totally suffocating yourself. I’m not saying you shouldn’t take a break or get a relief.
But delayed gratification is where it’s at.
One of the Best Decisions I Ever Made
by Ari Koinuma on Jan.28, 2009, under Ari's Diary
was to marry my wife.
Last night I was telling her about how afraid I was about moving forward with my decision to pursue my own business. I told her that I was afraid of spending money to buy the things I “need” for my business. I am afraid of losing money, and I hate spending money in general because of it.
She looked at me and said “you’re saying that to hold yourself back.”
Just like that, with a single sentence she cut through to the heart of the issue. I was letting my fear get in my way again, but that one line cleared up so much — I immediately felt freed and empowered to continue following my intuitions and make bold choices to pursue my (and my family’s) success.
My wife is one of the smartest and most able people I’ve ever seen. She seems to have the midas touch — there’s nothing she can’t do, from cooking to teaching to singing to writing. Plus, she’s deeply intuitive and has an amazing ability to cut through BS and get to the very core of the matter.
She was really my first-ever girlfriend, when we started dating at the ripe old age of 19 (me) and 18 (her). But it felt so good that immediately I started wondering if this was the person I was going to marry.
The first 10 years of marriage was rocky and I spent a lot of the times questioning that decision. But it seems that with time, I wonder less and less and realize how right I was to marry her. I’d like to think that it’s a sign of good marriage when it keeps getting better.
I guess I was hearing my intuition when I wondered if this was the person I was going to marry shortly after we started dating. I’m glad I listened.
