Imagine yourself on a crowded bus, or a train. You’ve secured yourself a seat. Lots of people standing.
One of them is an oldish looking lady, with a few bags that look heavy.
You get up out of your seat and gesture to her that she can sit down.
Her disgruntled response: “Hey, don’t insult me. I’m not as old as I look. I can stand.”
If you were trying to be a good person in her eyes, then you’ll be annoyed, hurt, confused. You’ll think twice before offering someone a seat again.
If you were trying to be a good person in your own eyes, you just chuckle, and move on. Next time you see an oldish and irritable-looking lady with a heavy load, you get up, without hesitation.
It doesn’t matter what you do. You can never ever make someone like you. If someone does, it’s because he/she chose to — perhaps it may have been influenced by your actions, but still, their choice.
Don’t spend your life pursuing such an unreliable, impossible objective.
Be a good person in your own eyes.